Whatever works

I don’t want to ever feel like I need to update.  The last thing I need in my life is another layer of constant responsibility.  One of the big things I’m trying to do in life is simplify it all.  So let’s not make an oxymoron out of it.

Breaking shit down and making use out of everything we “own.”  Being generous even if someone doesn’t deserve it.  It just depends, how much someone should expect to get in each situation.  I want to cultivate a world where we are generous and unafraid to share, knowing we all get it all as well.  The truths should matter.  Even knowing what nastiness is in McNuggets, people, including me, continued to eat them.  One of my favorite things to say is, “Even knowing the truth, I am fooled.”  But in knowing the truth, I hopefully am headed away from continuing to be fooled.  So there is hope.  I am not sure what all causes things that cause things like mental illness and devastation by human activity.  But after what I’ve experienced lately, which I have been reluctant to share, I think I’m starting to figure it out.  And most importantly, how to stop it.

It’s all about the lesson in everything to me.  And I believe that there is ultimate truth, one encompassing truth in every situation.  I just want the truth about everything, and to live in spite of my negative instincts.  I am content on my path, but I am not content with allowing myself to be all the same shitty ways I always have been.  Just do your best to love what you have to work with at this very moment.  I have rarely been able to look at myself from an outside perspective and see exactly what needs to be done about me.  But if we could.

I feel like people are worthy of mercy, because there is always a good reason why some people are really fucked up and some are just generally flawed like everyone else, and some people that are even better than that.  What’s to blame for evil?  Is there anything to blame?  Some say Satan.  I am not sure what that presence really is, but I strongly felt myself expel it the other night, and… I can’t even say more about it.  It sounds too nuts to just share with the world.  So for now I’m just going to get more comfortable with talking about this stuff and see what does come out.  It’s going to be wild at some point anyway and it’ll come out.  Just need to know how to describe these things.  But the outcome of this situation was, there was a major healing over the past couple days.

So many spiritual things happening that I just have been wanting to soak in rather than write about.  But whatever is typed will work.

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