Why I go to church

Today’s Sunday sermon was a good example of why I like going to church despite not believing in Jesus.  My reasons for attending are worth explaining.  It’s not something I got into when I was working through the timelines, since I just wanted to get the most important things out there in order to catch up to present day.

My whole life I have been hungry for simple truth and reason for the way the world works, and WHY it’s happening.  Almost my whole life, I believed either that there’s no way to know, or that I’d already figured it out.  But I really don’t know why we’re here, and now that I’ve been listening to testimonies on why people believe in Jesus, I officially want to know for SURE what the truth is, so I can stop giving the wishy-washy response, “I don’t know what the truth is.”

Wisdom is important to me.  I have gathered a lot of it in my life and tried to apply it to my life.  I live for it.  Clear-cut reason and wisdom can get you very far in life, and get you through tough times.  Before I declared any belief in God, that was what I relied on.

When I first started going to church with Eileen in early 2015, I listened to the sermons for grains of truth, even though I didn’t believe every word said.  There was much to be gained regardless of my differences in faith.  And as for the things I didn’t believe, I was still able to apply nearly 100% of those sentiments in a symbolic way.  (Mostly mentions of Jesus, since I just see him as Love if he’s not a true physical figure.)

For some people, denial of God and Jesus is what they think is an obvious reason not to go to church.  But it’s so much more than talking about the bible!  You meet other people who want to do positive things in the world, and are truly working on themselves.  You know how hard it is to find people who do more than just TALK about improving themselves?  These people gather every week and focus on a higher power and fresh wisdom to sculpt their futures.  Those are the kinds of people I wanna be around.

Part of the reason I became serious about church was because I realized I need to be surrounded with more people that have similar goals as mine, and I have met many people at church indeed who are on a similar path.  Strength in numbers.  When you are constantly surrounded by people who are not moving forward, or are even bringing you down with them, you are not so encouraged on your own path.

The other church-goers and I may have a major difference between us- they declare Jesus as their lord and savior, and I am deeply inspired by the messages and communion, but can’t honestly say that I even believe Jesus existed.  Since I have been searching for the truth for months now, I find hard scientific evidence on the web for his physical existence, but it’s hard to just up and change what you believe in.  So I’m only beginning to accept that he actually existed.  The next step, if I get there, is to determine if he is God, and if the stories of his miracles are real.

It makes sense that I ended up at a Christian facility, because I simply happen to believe a lot of the things that I learn from that walk of faith.  Gladness, mercy, strength, humility, humble living… all these things, I already believed in, and I’m glad to have found a place that not only fosters what I truly believe in deep down, but also presents ideas that I hadn’t thought of, including things that were hard for me to have to face, but really needed to.  This place really makes me think.

The reason I said at the beginning that today’s sermon was a good example of why I attend church is because the pastor preached about exactly what I’m doing right now: He said to tell your story to people.  One great way to connect with others to your path is to know your own story and be able to tell it clearly when the right moment comes.  I found that very interesting since I am really getting this blog together now.

It does feel as if every sermon I attend is perfect timing for whatever I am going through at the time.  That fact alone encourages me to continue going as often as I do.  It’s like the messages and I are in sync.  I get wisdom from it and can apply my current circumstances to what’s being discussed.  Today was no exception.

I don’t know when I’m going to die, so I don’t know if I will ever believe in Jesus the way my new friends do, or if I’ll know the truth before I die.  But the fact that good-hearted people with goals are entering my life, and the sermons are impacting my life in such a positive way, keeps me wanting to go.

When explaining how to tell your story to people today, the pastor described the three parts of knowing your story: Who you were, what happened next, and who you are now.  This blog definitely outlines that already.  A good sign that I am on the right track to learning the truth and being able to tell my story.


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